Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Pilates Update

I am pleased as punch to announce that I've managed to do at least 20 minutes of my pilates video each day since I started my challenge. And in most cases, I make it 40 minutes. Even one day, I made it 50! But was too tired to do the last 10 minute section with weights.

I wouldn't say the workout is getting easier because I think its challenging to me. However, the way I'm handling it is getting easier. I don't feel like I'm going to keel over and die after doing the warm up any more. I can walk up and down stairs and not want to cry afterwards. YAY!

I had some spare time on Sunday to do the video while everyone was home. I was a little bit afraid that Brian would come watch me and laugh, but he didn't :) And my kids had a great time getting in on the action!


My friend Tarah told me that you can substitute cans of veggies or soup if you don't have any weights. My kids thought this was a fabulous idea!


This is Jayce getting ready for his "lunge position" :P







Jaina really got into the video. She ran to get an old preschool nap mat that a friend gave us a long time ago to use as her exercise mat.



After she followed along for a few minutes, she said, "This is really easy!" Well, yeah... especially when you are only doing the last few minutes of the cool down stretching segment at the end of the video :)



And when you get tired of exercising, you can just sit on the floor and eat candy. I think the last time we did Pilates together, it was cookies instead. I think I let Jayce eat too many sweets.



On my yelling resolution.... well, I think that one is way more important than daily exercise, but unfortunately, I am not doing as well with it.

The other night at dinner, I was fixing a plate of food in the kitchen while listening to Jaina and Jayce go ahead and start their dinners at the table a few feet away. I heard Jaina offer Jayce a shrimp to eat from her plate.

"Want to eat a shrimp, Jayce? Its really good! And pink! This used to swim in the ocean but we killed it and cut off its eyes and took his legs and tail off, so now we can eat it!" (thanks, Jaina, for that visual.)

Jayce certainly did NOT want to try a shrimp and started to crinkle up his nose and gag a little at the mere thought of trying a shrimp.

I called from the kitchen counter, "Jaina, that's enough. He doesn't want one. Its okay if he doesn't want to eat it. Not everyone likes shrimp. Just put it back on your plate."

Jaina either didn't hear me or chose not to listen, but it was probably the latter. I look up from what I was doing to see her shove a shrimp in his face trying to force him to eat it.

I lost it. "JAINA!!! I TOLD YOU NO!!!!!"

Ugh. That's all I need is to set Jayce back months on his feeding progress. Honestly, what the hell was she thinking? She knows better!

But... did I really need to yell?

I think if I had stopped my activity, walked the few feet over to the table, and physically removed the shrimp from Jaina's hands, it would have conveyed the same message of displeasure with her actions. And it would have stopped the behavior in its tracks more effectively, which is what I wanted my yelling to do across the room.

Then I could have calmly asked if Jayce was okay and talk to Jaina about why she felt the need to do this. And when Jaina explained that she loves shrimp so much and thought that if she could just get Jayce to eat a bite, he'd realize that he loves it too. And then I would let her know that although she had great intentions and it was nice of her to want to help Jayce learn to eat new foods, that was not the way that his therapists wanted him to learn.

Sigh. But I didn't do any of the above. I just yelled. Blamed Jaina for being mean and saw Jayce as the helpless victim.

I think my problem is keeping calm in the heat of the moment. Maybe if I continue to hold myself accountable through blogging about how I could (and should) have handled the situation, I'll remember to do it in the future.

I hope.

Cause a few hours later, the next morning, I yelled at Jaina for not wearing socks with her shoes. Yes, really.

In that case, I was tired, grumpy, annoyed, and frustrated in general with the day's events. And when Jaina took off her sweaty winter boot and I got a whiff of her foot odor, it was the straw that broke the camel's back. I loudly informed her that she would NEVER EVER WEAR THOSE SHOES WITHOUT SOCKS AGAIN! Jaina just looked at me with a "wow... mom has really lost it" look on her face and said, "Okay, no problem. Socks from now on. Got it."

Thanks, Jaina, for remaining calm when your mother certainly was not. I then apologized, realizing that it really wasn't her stinky shoes that had set me off to begin with. And we moved on :)

I wake up every morning realizing it is a new day. A new day to accomplish new tasks, a new day to start over from any ugliness from before. I aim to start the day out right, not stressed, so that the morning can continue into a great day.

I hope you all have a great day today too!!

12 comments:

  1. Cute how your kids would join in when you do your pilates. J & Z would cheer me on when I did the 30-Day Shred. :)

    It's a constant struggle for me, too, the yelling. Often times when I replay the scene, I could think about several ways I could have handled it better. The children, bless their souls, are such forgiving little people and while that adds to my guilt, it does make me want to try harder at being more calm and less (over)reactive.

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  2. Of course I will follow you Jess! So glad that I've stumbled upon your blog. :)

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  3. That is so cute of your kids to join you in pilates. My kids shake their head at me and leave the room when I do The 30 Day Shred.

    I used to be a yeller also. That is a tough habit to break. I wish you the best of luck with it.

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  4. I used to struggle a lot with yelling when my kids were younger (and I was a lot younger too). It does get better! Hang in there!

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  5. I think it is great that you are working on not yelling at your children. I had a problem with that when mine were young, I was a single mom and working 40-50 hrs a week, so I was just exhausted. Once I changed jobs, my daughter (who was 9 at the time) told me she liked me a whole lot better. I was so ashamed that I had yelled at them, I could have cried. Now they are adults and they love to tease me about that time in our life, since they have children and understand what was going on with me and how stressful life can get. Keep up the good work! Oh, and that exercise will help with the yelling also.

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  6. I love when the kids workout with me. My oldest, who was less than 2 at the time, would do prenatal yoga with me when I was pg with my youngest. Can't wait until they can both do it with me! And the yelling thing...yeah, I am working on that too. Not so much yelling, but that frustrated mommy tone. Bad!

    Good job with the working out, too!!!!!

    Thanks for stopping by,
    Tamara
    www.theunexperiencedmom.com

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  7. Don't be so hard on yourself. I too am working on that goal. One thing I've realized is that I will NEVER be perfect and I can learn to genuinely say I am sorry when I make a mistake. Kids are wonderful at forgiving - hooray for that!

    AND I always try to imagine I am on one of those "hidden camera" TV shows - is that one "bad moment" gonna be on TV :)

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  8. Not only am I a terrible yeller but, I also yell at the most ridiculous things. I can even catch myself mid-yell and be telling myself "this is stupid" but, can't stop.

    My big problem is that I get in a tizzy over something silly and then when TRex doesn't listen or obey that is when the silly thing turns into an issue. Gotta work on picking my battles!

    Can I join the workout at the part where the candy and cookie eating on the floor starts? How far into the dvd is that? I can just skip ahead!

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  9. haha I love the kids doing pilates with you mine do p90x with me and say how easy it is too...now that could make a tired underfed mom yell ;)

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  10. I loved seeing your kids workout with you. Mine love to do yoga with me(Wii Fit). It cracks me up to see my 2yr old do a really good warrior pose.

    The yelling thing, *sigh*, yeah we're working on that here too. And not just that, but my attitude in response to them. When I noticed my 8yr old having constant attitude with her younger sister I decided we needed to be really cautious about how we react to frustrations. I will now have a really good day followed by a bad day where I tend to look at the ceiling and breathe before I respond.

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  11. You've inspired me to pick up a pilates dvd from the library. We'll see how it goes.

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  12. Nice to know there are some fabulous moms out there who yell at their kids sometimes, too... it makes me feel better AND want to do better. Thanks, Jess!

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Thanks for commenting!