Thursday, June 16, 2011

I'm still alive

barely.

I'm blogging from the comfort of my bedside laptop, which unfortunately, means no pictures.

Morning sickness is actually the best for me, ironically, in the morning. Its the afternoon/evening when I feel like hell on earth. So this morning I tried not taking a zofran tablet. I was pretty much regretting my decision by 10 AM.

Distraction seems to help. I can't possibly live in my bed for the next few weeks until my first trimester passes, so I've been trying to keep up with all my normal stuff. As long as I take the zofran, I don't puke. And I can tolerate food. That may not sound like much, but believe me, its SO much better than the alternative.

But through this all, I've felt like a horrible mother. My kids and I had so many plans this summer. We've barely done anything on our list. Instead they've watched way too much TV and eaten way too many bags of chips that they can reach in the pantry.

And I have wept with joy and relief at 5:30 every day this week when I've dropped them off at Vacation Bible School for three hours. For three hours they have fun with their friends and I have a date on my couch with no one bothering me.

I know this will pass. And I'll (hopefully) I can look back at this in a couple of weeks (or months, or years) and say, "Wow, those x amount of weeks really sucked! Thank goodness it was for only that short time!"

Cause when you are in the midst of the tunnel, sometimes its really hard to see the light at the end of it.

8 comments:

  1. XOXO Jessie

    Bug your genius husband to network your laptop! ;)

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  2. Awww, that just plain sucks. Being so sickly during a pregnancy is no fun. I am glad they have bible time with their friends and you get some peace and quiet even if it is a short time a day. I hope it passes quickly and you get back to your summer plans!

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  3. I hate not feeling well for so long that you forget what it feels like be feel normal. :( Hope this passes quickly for you.

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  4. Easier said than done I know but don't feel guilty about the kids! They know you can't help it and a few weeks of too much t.v. and junk food won't hurt them in the long run :) Do you have anyone who can pick them up and take them to the park or the library for an hour or two? Or maybe their friends' parents could take them over to their house for a couple of hours once or twice a week so they can play/hang out? A friend of mine did that when Lucy was born, took Max and Abby over to her house to play for a couple of hours so I could sleep/take care of Lucy without having to worry about the older two.

    The morning sickness will pass (praying it's sooner than later) and you'll be feeling more like your old self. You'll be able to get in lots of fun activities with the kids before the baby comes. Do you have an ultrasound picture yet? Look at that and that can be your light at the end of the tunnel. Take care!

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  5. I hate it so much for you. Morning sickness is just the worst! Hopefully not too much longer before it subsides....

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  6. I totally get where you are coming from! When I was pregnant with our second, my first 20 weeks fell over the summer months. I call it "The Summer of Vomit" cuz that's all I did, aside from feeling guilty about having the TV on 24/7 and leaving boxes of fish crackers out for my oldest. Zofran wasn't a real life saver for me either. It did stop me throwing up, but I still felt nausea and just plain sick until about week 20. Tried sea bands, peppermint, more protein...nothing works for me! Same with this baby. Sick, sick, sick up until about 20 weeks. With our oldest, I never got sick. The only pregnancy symptom I had was the belly and feeling the baby move. I think it's gotten harder as I get older! Haha
    Are you taking the dissolvable Zofran? That helped with my gag issues, except for when I brushed my teeth! Haha The only saving grace is knowing there is a beautiful baby growing in your tummy and being sick is a sign that things are going well :) I hope it passes for you soon!!!!!

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  7. I just remembered something I was going add...My OB recommended switching to Flinstone vitamins twice daily since I thought they might have something to do with how yucky I felt. They tasted a whole lot better than the prenatals!!

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